How is it that a single person can so easily ruin something which would otherwise be enjoyable? A sheer clashing between personalities that makes something seem nigh impossible, and extremely uncomfortable. Maybe I'm just looking to blame someone other than myself; looking to hide my own shortcomings. I'm not really sure, but in the end, perhaps it's more than just one person ruining.
I really, sincerely hope that I can get myself through this and not lose the things that are most important to me along the way. I need my head on a pillow, bad...
The only thing you'll lose is maybe some time, some patience, and for a time, a little faith in the whole system and, by the sounds of it, yourself.
ReplyDeleteBut those former one's aren't terribly important and can be fixed, and as for your self worth, you shouldn't let one poor experience get you hating yourself so much. We all have our limits, and at times it's good to test those, to push them, but it's always important to be aware of them, and to accept them for who we are, and not hate them for who we're not.
You can always make changes to improve yourself, if that's what you really want, but it takes a while, take small steps. Don't put unfair expectations on yourself, and don't let others do the same.
Sometimes we're thrown challenges, but sometimes those challenges are impossible to complete, and we have to know when to bow out, or when to charge forth, and to be happy and have no regrets within ourselves with the choices we made.
This is but one small moment is a million more moments of your life. You'll get through it, with the people who love and support you, and through your own strength and will.
Also, I love you <3